Eating 100 Chicken McNuggets without dying is easy. Here’s how:
1) Don’t eat 100 Chicken McNuggets. Just don’t do it. You’ll die. I ate 100 Chicken McNuggets by also involving two other people (one of whom was a diabetic and they kick ass at eating a lot of food), so I only ate 25. The other guy, Charlie, ate 33, and the diabetic guy, Jordan, ate 42. That’s why none of us is dead. We want to die, but we aren’t dead. Anything that goes above 50 nuggets might result in death, or a coma, or something like that.
2) Don’t eat for at least four hours prior to destroying your insides by eating a bunch of processed chicken. If there is anything, anything at all, in your stomach before the Ronald McDonald supplied onslaught on your intestines it will result in war. And in that war, you will lose. And all the food will retreat, if you catch my drift. Just fast that day, save yourself the trouble.
3) Get a drink. If you don’t have a drink to help break down the McNuggets your stomach will explode. Or get cancer. Coke has roughly the same effect as battery acid, and battery acid is about the only thing that can break down 10+ McNuggets. Your feeble stomach acids have no chance. Help them. There is no shame in that.
4) Find a rhythm. For me, it was two bites per McNugget. No more, no less. Then you’ll get so caught up in the monotony of the ordeal that you’ll lose track of how many you’ve eaten until it’s too late. It’s the ultimate blitzkrieg on your stomach. Before you know it, you’ll be on your third box of ten and your stomach will just start to realize you’re trying to kill yourself. Bam. Quantity, not quality. Or sanity.
5) Rest after. Don’t move. Don’t. You’ll immediately fall/sit/lay back down, so don’t even bother getting up to begin with. Consider it a victory lap of sorts, but without any motion. This is probably the most obvious of the tips since you’re body will physically prevent you from moving after more than 15 McNuggets, but it’s worth saying.
So there you have it. McDonald’s has 20 McNuggets for $5, so go out there, get some buddies and support the evil corporate restaurant chain conglomerate and simultaneously take a few months off your life. It’ll be a good story. This is what college is about. Just don’t die.
Addition: My friend Sara thought it would be a good idea to add the health facts regarding eating 100 Chicken McNuggets. I agree. These stats are from the McDonald’s Web site, so you can look for yourself. These stats are all based on 100 Chicken McNuggets.
- Calories: 4600, 2600 of which are from fat
- Fat: 290 g, 50 g of Saturated Fat (that’s 440% and 250% of the Daily Values, respectively); but no Trans Fat!
- Cholesterol: 700 mg, or 230 % of the Daily Value
- Sodium: 10,000 mg, or 420% of the Daily Value
- Protein: 240 g
I think these stats just solidify my claim made in tip number one.
Go Reda Blog 
I’m literally appalled that you did this. Appalled and not really that surprised and for some reason, kind of a little bit impressed. Nice work.
Thank you. It was a tough journey, but we all pulled through. We all worked hard. I just want to thank God, my parents, and my friend Justin for driving.
Ew. That’s really all I can say about that. I’m glad you didn’t eat all those nuggets though. I’m sure you really didn’t want to die at McDonald’s. Not the way to go.
Death by McNugget is not the way I want to go at all. And yes, ew. But a victorious ew.
Wow! One of my friends tried to eat 50 and he made it to 46 and couldn’t go on.
This is unbelievably disgusting, but props for making the attempt and blogging about it:]
Whoever your friend is, kudos to him. I don’t know how he did it.
I think I’ll follow rule #1 after reading those stats. As for you and your friends, all I can say is I’m glad you didn’t die.
I ate like 15 today and I’m freaking out, I’m not healthy, but after seeing all of these comments, I think I’ll be fine, sick maybe, but not dead(I hope)